Starting Over...Again!

Well I have to start by apologizing for not being on here in such a long time with anything worth reading. Well ok there has been A LOT going on in the past year but it was SO much that required SO much energy that blogging about it would only have been more painful.


I will try to make it brief as I really dislike rehashing old news. Why? Because rehashing is simply reliving painful memories that does not help in the process of healing. But before I go into this I must state the following...


I know that I have posted many positive things about my husband and marriage in my previous blogs of which I will not be removing as those are memories that I will hold forever. When I blogged those stories it is because I chose to recount the blessings as I saw them coming. I chose to remember the moments that made me laugh, smile and giggle for I used them as ammunition to fight back the tears. I chose to forgive and hold onto hope for the sake of my children.


Long story short...we are legally separating. The issues at hand have been in and out of counseling for 8 years. I simply cannot do it anymore. I have been physically ill more often anyone should be, depressed, and unable to function or sleep because of the stress and fighting. Too much was sacrificed for the sake of "trying to save the marriage" but one can NOT have a one sided marriage. It takes two to make it work but it only takes one to end it. Neglect - number one killer of marriage. (no I don't have statistics - just experience)


So he has moved out now for the past two weeks after yet another anger explosion.  I simply couldn't take it anymore. Unpredictability is a scary thing to have with a spouse.


All this to say - in the past two weeks, I can sleep again and I can function normally. The way it should be. I spend my days being stable for my kids and on the weekends I take my moments to let out my tears. Sadness over so many things. Too many to count.


So with this I hope to have the opportunity to come back more often with fun and tender blog posts.


Muah! xoxo 


thank you for taking the time to read this.